Big Brother Africa, a reality television show, aired on the Dstv Network on satellite has caused many debates centred on the issue of culture since its first season in 2003.
Many of the BBA contestants have faced a lot of criticism when they return home after the show, with many of their fellow countrymen criticizing them about their un-African behaviour which they would have displayed during their stay in the house.
Zimbabwean contestants Tapiwa Mhere, Munya Chidzonga, Maneta, Roki Josphats and lately Pokello Nare have come under criticism in their country and are accused of showing a culture that is contrary to the Zimbabwean way of life. Their lives on and off the show have come under heavy scrutiny and the story is not peculiar to Zimbabwe alone, with similar stories occurring in Ethiopia, South Africa, Zambia, Nigeria, Angola and Ghana.
This year BBA’s star couple, Zimbabwean Pokello and Ghana’s Elikem, has received a lot of backlash for the way they have handled their introductions, Elikem came to Zimbabwe during the first of September to meet Pokello’s family and Pokello left for Ghana a week later to meet his family as well.
In her nearly four weeks stay in Ghana, she and her boyfriend have been spotted club hopping and she in dressing that would make the conservative mothers of Africa blush with embarrassment.
According to African tradition Pokello was not supposed to stay with her boyfriend until they got married and it is considered a disgrace for a daughter in law to be seen half naked by her in-laws.
She has been called a bad role model and loose, to make matters worse the public keeps bringing up the issue of her leaked sex tape. This girl surely deserves to be in the same pages as Kim Kardashian and Paris Hilton, she is rich, has a successful business, a sex tape, people hate to love her and yet amidst all that she continues to forge forward as if she has no care in the world.
The question this writer poses to the reader is this, is Africa justified in calling her loose, wayward and not cultural?
Culture as we know it, is dynamic always evolving and changing with each new generation that comes. In our African culture we say “a child’s behavior is a reflection of the family he or she comes from,” is it possible that Pokello and the female contestants of BBA are just reflecting the current African society?
Pokello is a product of a society and a family, and it seems in her circles her behavior is not as abnormal as we all would think as is evident by the overwhelming support from her family and friends. Is it then right for us to cast stones on a child who is only reflecting what we have taught her?
BBA and Pokello are an indication that Africa is at a cultural crossroad, where on one side we are trying hard to hold on to our traditions and on the other side, time and the media are pushing us to let go.
The African family as we know it has disintegrated over the past decade due to a lot of factors, the extended family structure that used to assist in the raising of a child is slowly disappearing. Gone are the days when a girl’s aunt’s used to be her confidant and advisors, now she barely knows them let alone speaks to them.
The pursuit of better education and jobs drove many of today’s parents from their rural homes to the big cities where they work from dawn till dusk and rarely have time for their kids. As soon as they get a bit of cash they move to the posh suburbs, enrol their kids in expensive A schools that care less what these kids get up to, these urban parents overcompensate their children with gifts and money to cover for their absence and these rarely have contact with their extended family who are considered too poor to matter.
Africa’s urban children are being raised by the Kardashian’s, Bold & the Beautiful and Generations, where they are taught that you can go and stay at your boyfriend’s house for three weeks and there is nothing wrong with it, that you can go meet you mother in law dressed in skimpy tight shorts and she would accept you. Check your facebook page right now, and see how many young ladies post pictures of themselves in skimpy clothes and boys posting profile pictures with pants dropped nearly to the ground, one of them might actually be your little sister or nephew.
Why do we cry foul when Pokello decides to go to her in laws wearing shorts when everyday at seven pm we sit in front of the TV with our 14 year old daughters to watch the Bold and the Beautiful and comment on how fashionable Brooke Logan is, when in front of our daughters and sons we sit glued to our screen whenever BBA is on air and vote out the decent young men and women in the show, calling them boring and not entertaining. Our children learn from us what is acceptable and what is not, how to behave when around other people and what not, we have let television and magazines become social teachers to our kids, and youths like Pokello are the result of that grave mistake.
Africa has been given a mirror of what our society is turning into and instead of throwing stones; Africa should work towards rectifying its mistake. Introduce cultural studies in schools; create more time to nature its children into men and women of dignity.
And yes put that stone down, stop hating on Pollikem and clean up your own house before you start pointing fingers.
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